Hezah, 26

Yup, that’s me having some unidentified religious experience into a bag of chocolate covered pretzels. I am not surprised; this isn’t anything new. I just figured I would actually document my strange twenty-something habits in hopes that others relate. Maybe if the Internet hasn’t imploded in twenty years, I’ll be able to look back on this with an odd sort of pathetic nostalgia. (Because in this scenario I am an avid foodie with a DesignSponge kitchen who throws effortlessly lavish dinner parties for my overly smart middle aged hipster posse.)

Here’s my problem: I can’t seem to put dinner on the table for myself. Most of my meals consist of a series of snacks that ultimately caloric-ally add up to a questionably balanced meal. For instance, tonight’s 5 course snack-a-thon included:

• pita crackers
• hummus
• yogurt dip
• vegetables (I had purchased these already cut up. I only had to break the plastic seal, and take off the lid.)
• 3-5 oversized pinches of cheddar cheese (Like, trying to eat shredded cheese over a bag, trying not to spill/waste precious cheese noodles.)
• unquantifiable amounts of chocolate covered pretzels

You saw my previous post: The Great Spaghetti-O’s Disaster of ‘12, things are NOT looking good for me. I clearly haven’t come to terms with this because I definitely spent a solid half hour comparison shopping for a fancy set of knives today. What do I actually intend on chopping, dicing, or slicing? I buy everything precut to encourage myself to actually eat “real food.” 

I gotta get a cook book…and maybe someone to use it for me.